Be particularly cautious about dating men at work. This means that until you’re both deeply committed to the relationship, don’t have sex with a coworker. Notice I didn’t say, “Don’t date a coworker.” You can socialize with a male colleague as long as you set and maintain strong protective boundaries. Watch your alcohol intake; your inhibitions are there to protect you, and alcohol can cause you to toss them out the window. Set limits before you go out with him; no kissing, no physical contact, just a platonic getting-to-know-you-outside-of-work screening process known as a first date. Have fun, but not too much fun! Move slowly and make him prove he has serious intentions toward you. After all, what’s the point of ruining your career and making yourself miserable for just a short-lived sexual fling? You’re worth more than getting used for sex, then dumped, by a man you have to face every day.

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Better to play it safe and assume that you’ll be the one to pay if you have sex with a man at work and the relationship fails. You’ll wish you had another job once you are forced by proximity to witness his new relationship when he gets another lover. Don’t let your infatuation override your common sense. Think this thing through to the end. How will you feel if you have sex with him, then he dumps you? Having sex with a coworker carries a high risk that must be balanced by receiving something of high value in return, i.e., a loving, committed long-term relationship. It would be worth considering waiting until you’re engaged or married. A serious commitment from a coworker you’re dating legitimizes the relationship and balances your risk. There are never guarantees, but at least the playing field will be level.